Either. [Jason busies himself with his food at rhe admission. His Bruce never cared about giving him a grappling gun after hearing about the near-fatal fall and Dick never seemed to notice Jasonβs issues around heights, though he supposes he knows why.]
( He wonders idly if the other Dick that had been a year ago is the one Jason knows. He, like Jason here and even like himself, had felt... out of place amongst the others. The Bat Belfry as Jason refers to them as. In that, there had been a sort of comradery between them. Or at least an understanding. )
Assumptions often lead to misunderstandings. Especially when lacking the evidence to see the bigger picture.
( Even if he were about to eat, his appetite would be gone the moment Jason goes and says what he does. Bruce stands there. Quiet. Knows exactly what it is Jason is referring to and his heart just⦠aches for him. Chopsticks are placed down - his attention more fixed on him and he turns enough to fully be there for him, arms at his sides, blue eyes soft in their gaze.
He doesnβt say anything, if only because he leaves it up to Jason with what more he wants or doesnβt want to say, but. What he does do, is reach out with a hand and gently place it there on Jasonβs arm. Gentle and quiet support. Meant to drop away the moment he wants it to be. )
[Jason stops chewing as well, his appetite also thoroughly soured. He looks up at Bruce when the hand touches his arm, but doesnβt pull away. Looking back down to his food,]
I was so tired of everyone blaming me. Everything was always my fault. Most of it wasnβt even my fault in the first place. And Iβ¦
[He swallows down the memories as they rise up, how he began to lean into open air before Dick stopped him.]
( As before, he lets Jason talk - gives him the time he needs to find the words, string them together, and decide whether or not he wants to even say them to him. Fingers offer a supportive squeeze to the arm they rest on, blue eyes still remaining soft in the way their gaze continues to linger on the other, and itβs only when Jason continues that said gaze drops down in thought for a moment before heβs lifting it back up to the other and heβs finding his own words to offer. )
Things are different here. I know they donβt always feel like itβ¦ but they're different because Iβm here and Iβve got you. Always.
[Jason looks up at Bruce again, his gaze still unsure despite it all. Thereβs a huge part of him that wants to believe this Bruce, to believe he wonβt run away when Jason needs him most.]
( The word is soft but sincere in every sense it can be. Fingers there still on Jason's arm, they move up then to gently but supportively grasp the other's shoulder, holding to him with a slow nod. )
( Because he realizes Jason prefers to be on his own β to take off when he feels like it and he can... relate. So incredibly much to that and with having spent over a year here in Etraya now and around... well, another as opposed to others, he can see that and it's why he lets him be the one to decide rather than be told what to do. )
[Jason bites his lip when he makes eye contact with Bruce. Thereβs a moment where he just might confess to his goings on with Crane and Silco, his desire to get rid of his fear. He opens his mouth and then closes it again.
Would Bruce rescind his offer if he knew that Jason had thrown in with a known druglord and untrustworthy chemist?]
( Thereβs a tinge of confusion there on his face β a blink of those blue eyes as he mulls over what Jason is trying to get at. If this were Gotham, he wouldnβt exactly condone the stealing, but. This isnβt Gotham. This is Etraya and one doesnβt pay for anything here when it comes to food, clothing, and other supplies. )
( A fear antidote. Already his mind goes to one person here who seemingly specializes in that and the concern gently rises in him, given the sort of threat heβs been told he can be, but. )
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[He takes a deep breath.]
And yeah, he dropped me off a building.
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Is it difficult? ( A beat. ) Being up here.
( In the penthouse, he means. )
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Iβm trying to stay away from the windows. I kinda. I see the fall when I look at them.
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I'll see about getting you a grapple gun. I can leave the drapes shut over the windows if that's easier.
( He's used to the dark. It doesn't bother him. )
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[Jason takes a bite of his chinese food, chewing.]
You donβt have to do that. No one else did.
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( But, no. Neither are a problem to him. )
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I think Dick assumed there werenβt any issues.
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Assumptions often lead to misunderstandings. Especially when lacking the evidence to see the bigger picture.
cw:si/attempt
How he stood on the edge of the building and look down, down, down. How tired he was if being an outsider to a team he was supposed to lead.]
I mean that. He probably thought I was comfortable after I was on the roof. After I⦠after I planned to jump.
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He doesnβt say anything, if only because he leaves it up to Jason with what more he wants or doesnβt want to say, but. What he does do, is reach out with a hand and gently place it there on Jasonβs arm. Gentle and quiet support. Meant to drop away the moment he wants it to be. )
cw: si/attempt
I was so tired of everyone blaming me. Everything was always my fault. Most of it wasnβt even my fault in the first place. And Iβ¦
[He swallows down the memories as they rise up, how he began to lean into open air before Dick stopped him.]
It was the only thing that made sense.
cw: si/attempt
Things are different here. I know they donβt always feel like itβ¦ but they're different because Iβm here and Iβve got you. Always.
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Yeah?
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( The word is soft but sincere in every sense it can be. Fingers there still on Jason's arm, they move up then to gently but supportively grasp the other's shoulder, holding to him with a slow nod. )
As long as you need me. I'm here.
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[Itβs almost as a warning, one against the belfry and against him as well. Only those who hate themselves would align themselves with him.]
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( Because he realizes Jason prefers to be on his own β to take off when he feels like it and he can... relate. So incredibly much to that and with having spent over a year here in Etraya now and around... well, another as opposed to others, he can see that and it's why he lets him be the one to decide rather than be told what to do. )
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I think I do.
[He might not stay all the time, but heβll be a presence in the Tower.]
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( At that, he ducks his head some β does so in a way to get a better look at Jasonβs face there, hand still on his shoulder. )
Anything ever happensβ¦ you ever need anything or anyone, youβve got me. Ok?
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Would Bruce rescind his offer if he knew that Jason had thrown in with a known druglord and untrustworthy chemist?]
I might be in trouble.
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With the others?
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No. Itβs something else.
[He is really debating internally about telling Bruce any more than he has.]
Iβve been helping someone get raw supplies and to do that Iβve been stealing from abandoned apartments.
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Raw supplies for what?
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I asked him to make a fear antidote. But I think heβs working on something bigger than that.
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Bigger like what?
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He's bringing in more people. I can't tell you who they are. It would be really fucking obvious I snitched.
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